Two and a half years later

Time flies

Two and a half years into my caring journey it is time to reflect on how things have progressed.

I have had the privilege of meeting so many people. Most of them have been welcoming and grateful. Some need that extra pair of hands to help with bathing or dressing, others appreciate the good food and clean home. Not everyone has needed personal care which is the first thing everyone imagines you will be doing all day every day.

Manual handling

Very few of my clients have required manual handling which has suited me well. My clients have been frail due to falls or had restricted arm movements due to arthritis.  Mainly I have worked with clients in varying stages of their alzheimers journey.

Guest in their home

Whoever I have been with, the most important thing for me has always been to remember I am a guest in their home, but I am there to make their life as smooth as possible.   My job is to enable them to enjoy the freedom of their home for as long as possible.

Passing on

Sadly some clients pass away and that
can be very emotional to deal with. You have had the privilege of sharing their final months or years together so it can be very sad when they are no longer there. They may have told you their thoughts on life and death and if they have said they are ready to leave this world, that makes it easier to accept their passing.

Moving to residential care

When the level of care becomes too intense the family may recognise that live in care is no longer an option and plans are made for the client to go to residential care. That can also be a very emotional experience as preparations are made. It can be particularly sad if you have spent a long time with that client and built up a strong relationship with them. 

Give yourself a break

Losing a client from death or going into residential care is hard and you might need a break to clear your thoughts before you are ready to start work again. Recharging your batteries is always a good idea.

Feeling at home

By and large you meet some lovely people and find yourself going back to the same clients on a schedule that works for you. It is a wonderful feeling when you return to a client feeling like it is a second home as you know the household routine and where to find everything in the house. It sometimes takes a while to get your bearings and remember the layout but it all comes back very quickly.

Appliance care

A lot of clients have all the manuals for their appliances like washing machines and driers but if they don't you can easily type in the make and model number into Google and download the manual. I prefer to check rather than damage the client's appliances.

Meals

Most clients like freshly cooked meals which you eat together at a time to suit the client.  Some prefer main meal mid day, others prefer main meal at night. Once I was caught out when on arrival I was told I was expected to provide my own meals and I would be given £40  per week towards that. I quickly opened a Tesco online shopping account and had a delivery the next day. Had I been told in advance I could have scheduled an order to be delivered on my day of arrival. That was an exceptional circumstance, and is really a poor reflection on the outgoing carer who should have thought to mention it in the two conversations we had prior to my arrival. It also shows the importance of keeping the agency informed of such arrangements which may change after the initial setup with the agency.

Car

A lot of agencies say drivers are preferred which is fair enough. However I am surprised at how many clients expect the carer to provide their car for client outings and appointments. Fortunately they are happy to pay mileage. However if a carer lives overseas they are not likely to have a car in the UK  so those jobs have to go to vehicle owners. Some clients do provide a vehicle for the carer to drive them but the client must add the carer to their insurance policy

Driving

I was very nervous to drive in the beginning and I even took some driving lessons to get the feel in an automatic car which I had never driven before. I managed to get non driving jobs in the beginning so I was more relaxed in my environment by the time I eventually did start driving for a client who had her own car. I have been fine in the quiet villages and the country but would not be too keen to drive in a busy city. 

Satnav

I did invest in Satnav which gives me confidence as my sense of direction is hopeless. A lot of people use Google maps instead of satnav but I guess that works well if your phone is on contract with lots of data each month. For those who use the phone as a satnav there is a fabulous magnet which looks and works much better than those suction holders that stick on the windscreen.

Doing ok

Things back in Zimbabwe are not good at the time I am writing this. That is a situation we are well accustomed to.  I have got used to the nomadic lifestyle and although my thoughts are constantly with loved ones at home I know I am doing the right thing. We all do this job for a specific and different reason. I am on track to achieve my goals.  Halfway into it at least I can see light at the end of the tunnel.

Vanish saves the Jik Chick

Firstly I am a Zimbo and secondly, I am a Jik chick. I only ever knew Jik and Sunlight green bar soap all my life and was really worried as to how I could survive in the UK without them. On holiday previously I managed to kill both an evil greasy black mark and a red pasta sauce stain on my son's lovely white jersey without Jik, but it was a monumental effort. I rubbed and scrubbed with white bar soap, thick white kitchen surface cleaner and in absolute desperation, I also squeezed and used the juice of a real lemon.  It took a long time but eventually I made a reasonable job of removing both stains.

Mugs, cups and teapots

As an avid tea drinker, I know the only way to remove tea stains from mugs, cups and teapots is Jik.  No scouring is necessary, just a small amount of Jik swilled around, possibly helped with a small dish brush or toothbrush specially kept for the purpose. By carefully pouring the precious Jik from mug to mug it is possible to make a tiny amount do a lot of work. The same applies to enamel pots and certain other cookware. Jik does the trick every time for me. The closest I have got to this in the UK so far is still real pure lemon juice.

Handle with extreme care

It is important to note that the above-mentioned procedures have to be done with great care. I can personally testify with one or two garments that have ended up with sad Jik splashes when I have been careless with the product. Perhaps this is the reason I have not yet found the equivalent product in the UK. It is a powerful liquid and needs to be used with considerable caution. I am so pleased I get to use it for added germ killing, sanitising and bleaching when at home in Zimbabwe.

Oh dear skid marks

Getting back to laundry and caring, there are sometimes accidents that require special attention. Here I am talking about either (whisper) poopy pants or maybe just (whisper again) skid marks. These accidents are quite embarrassing for the poor client, and there is a strong likelihood you will be the person who has to deal with it.  The quicker it is dealt with the better but this requires fast action from the wearer. An immediate flush and soak give the best chance of zero staining. Unfortunately more likely than not you may find you are only presented with the problem once it has been quite well established. You will have to maintain good humour and find the right product to sort out the stain. 

Both of you just want the stain to vanish

With no Jik to help solve the problem, I turned to Google. Lo and behold, the people in the UK have survived without Jik all along because they have Vanish.  It exists in all forms, liquid, gel, foam and powder! There is a formulation for white and also coloured fabrics. They even have a stain bar which is as close as I can get to my favourite Sunlight and probably much better than using someones precious Dove Beauty Cream bar. My particular product of choice for the job I was confronted with was an Oxi Action Powder for Whites.

Having donned the absolutely essential gloves I added a quarter measure of powder with a three-quarters measure of water mixed to a paste in a clean used margarine tub. I applied this to the offending stain and left it to soak initially for the stated ten or fifteen minutes giving the product time to work its magic. I then used a brush to help work in the product and left it for a longer period. After some effort and waiting I was certainly a lot happier with the final result.  The rinsed, dried and sparkly white garment was neatly folded and left where my client could find it that evening. 

Brownie points for making it white again

I never mentioned what a mission it had been to deal with that stain. I would like to think that I scored quite a few brownie points for tact and discretion thanks to my new found stain removal secret. Part of the art of being a good carer!

P.S. Great news - I found some

I am delighted to share that in a client home I did find a large bottle of supermarket home brand basic bleach which made my day.  I will keep an eye open for it in other supermarkets as well, However, having discovered Vanish for the laundry  I am a total convert. Now I can have stain-free cups and teapots too.  Happy days!

What shall we talk about

The fun side of this job is that hopefully, you keep meeting new people. Of course, if they really like you and want you back to care for them, then you will have broken the communication barrier and this will not be a problem for you. So this post is to help you start a good flow of conversation at the outset.

A good place to start

First impressions count. Show warmth and friendliness and let this carry through in your body language. Let them be the focus of your attention. Enquire about their health or their family. Maintain eye contact but keep it relaxed. Be a good listener. Make sure you understand any requests they make by repeating it back to them so there is no confusion.

Useful topics of conversation

The golden rule has always been to avoid religion and politics. That is always sound advice. There is still plenty to talk about :

• gently ask them about themselves, they may have had fascinating careers or lived through significant world events (depending on the client you may not need the rest of this list as this item alone might keep them fully energised for the whole duration of your stay).   
• food and restaurants, local and all over the world
• holiday destinations and why they choose them
• music, including changes in taste of music as one gets older
• current sporting events e.g. football matches, horse races, Olympics
• pets and other animals 
• X-factor, The Voice, Great British Bake Off, Strictly Come Dancing or whatever current TV show or celebrity gossip or scandal (none of these will work if your client is an intellectual but  if things need spicing up these should do the trick one way or another) 

Total respect

It is a genuine privilege to spend time with these amazing people. They have wonderful stories to tell and we can honestly learn so much from them. Some of them were pioneers in industries or even present during the two world wars. Many of them can share incredible tales of courage and bravery when they were young. These people are so inspiring and they honestly deserve our absolute respect. It will be a most rewarding and enriching experience for you to listen to them and understand their world. 

Putting on the gloves

I remember when my mom had to have a colonoscopy. I still wonder if she had to have it, nevertheless she was sent for one. "Lie back and think of England... "   I digress.
When we met the surgeon at the initial consultation he was suitably dressed to impress with good quality trousers, long sleeved shirt and a tie. In the theatre however he was quite a formidable sight with his industrial strength plastic apron, white gumboots and brandishing his camera stuck on that long flexible pipe. The pipe probably has a correct medical name but they tactfully spare us the finer details.  They adhere to the theory that the less we know the better. Anyway it was not quite " the devil wears Prada," but certainly he dons plastic.

Personal Protective Equipment

The image of the surgeon in his protective gear was what came to  mind when covering the topic in training. The surgeon had done the procedure loads of times and he knew the kinds of things that could happen. People have worked out long back that disposable protective kit is way better than complicated and near impossible laundry. As a carer you will most likely be handling the laundry too.
If your assignment entails personal care, do yourself a favour and get the stuff you need. Just try and be really discreet and laid back about how you put it on and take it off when in front of the client. Humour will help a lot too.

Cleaning the loo

While we are "talking dirty" I have another strong image in my mind that compares very favourably with any training I have ever had on health and hygiene. A friend  of mine was undergoing medical training and shared the surprising results of a field trip the students were taken on. They were measuring the fecal content of the display shelves at the local take away. The look of disgust on her face said it all. The hygiene was considerably lacking in an area where absolute cleanliness was critical.  

Another school colleague was a newly graduated doctor in private practise in the local community.
I met her in the supermarket and saw about ten bottles of really strong thick toilet cleaner dominating the space in her trolley. Her training must have emphasised the importance of toilet hygiene, and this vivid picture in my mind has been a permanent reminder of something that is really important in every home.

Gloves

Strong rubber gloves and disposable ones are essential for a number of tasks in the home. Using them for cleaning the loo makes the job less daunting. If you are allergic to one kind you may not be to another. Be sensible about their use and disposal, and minimise the risk of infection.  There are some great You Tube videos on cleaning toilets in case you have lived this long without having to clean your own and need to confirm the best method. You can get it down to fine art and be done properly in under three minutes. Your health and that of your client depends on it
So put on your gloves and just go for it.

Food glorious food

Mealtime is probably the highlight of the day for your client. It is an integral part of why you are there. Make sure you know how to prepare simple nutritious meals for your clients. Food safety and hygiene should be covered in your training, but make it your business to have as much kitchen knowledge as possible.

Practice makes perfect

If you know cooking might be a problem for you, get some practice in before you leave home. Get some good recipe books or search on YouTube, there is tons of free information out there. You might have a favourite chef who has done beginner courses and videos you can learn from.

Jamie shows us how

I am a  big fan of  Jamie Oliver and this site has everything to get you started. Explore the whole site, there is tons of information there to get you up and running. There is also a brilliant video of what NOT to do in a kitchen.

You will find so many useful sites, pick one you like and learn as much as you can.

Easily chewed and swallowed foods

You need to continue with your clients preferred diet when caring for them. However, you will be more confident if you arrive with a repertoire of at least five breakfasts, lunches, and dinners, plus some decent puddings (bread and butter pudding is an absolute must.) Remember that your clients are likely to have problems with things like chewing, and maybe even swallowing, so choose meals that are easily tolerated by older folk.

Supermarket lifesavers 

Supermarkets also make things easy these days with nearly ready to eat things like fish already battered and crumbed. All you have to do is prepare them exactly as stated on the packaging and add some well prepared and cooked vegetables.  If salads are suitable for your client, make sure pieces are cut small to make it easier for them, Custard, jellies and ice cream are evergreen favourites for dessert.

Check the online stores to get an idea of what is available in the shops that would be suitable for older peoples menus.

Practice makes perfect

Well presented and tasty food will make your client happy and keep them healthy. You might even be forgiven for other things you aren't that good at as long as they enjoy your food.